Learn About Chinese Customs
You'll enjoy your China visit more if you understand the differences between what you as an American consider polite and reasonable, and what's considered "good manners" in China. Make a note of these cultural differences that very often confuse visitors.
Personal space is a Western concept; don't expect yours to be respected in China. When you're in public places, people may stand very close, bump into you on crowded streets without apologizing, and get in your face when they're talking to you. They are not being rude!
While close physical contact with strangers is okay, direct eye contact is considered intimate, so you may find casual acquaintances and business associates averting their gaze in conversation.
Spitting on the sidewalk or street is common practice.
People often smoke indoors without asking permission.
Chinese love cute kids – and cute foreign kids – and may approach and stare, take pictures or reach out to touch the child's hair, pinch a cheek or even give a hug.
People you've only just met may ask your age or salary as a way of getting to know you.
Humility is a virtue in China – people who brag or dwell on their accomplishments are considered rude. If you get a complement; the best response is to smile and return it.
Seniority trumps gender; in fact, there is no concept of "ladies first." Women don't expect to be first through the door, and waiters will first serve the most senior man at the table.
Eating out is an important social event in China, and if you are visiting friends or business associates, you're sure to be invited to a banquet. Whether it's business-related or social, learn about Chinese banquet customs.
At the dinner table, don't be surprised to hear people slurping or talking with their mouths full.
Chinese people don't "go Dutch" and split meal checks. If you're invited to a meal, the polite thing to do is let the host pay, and reciprocate by paying for the next meal.
Don't ask for cold water at someone's home or in a business meeting, as your host might only be able to offer you hot water or tea. (Chinese typically do not have bottled water on hand, and foreigners should avoid tap water.)
Gift-giving customs
The Chinese consider gift giving an important way to build business and social relationships. Whether you're visiting someone in their home or attending a meeting, you'll please your host if you follow China's gift etiquette, which tends to be more formal than it is in the West. A few things to remember:
A "no" to your offer of a gift doesn't necessarily mean "no" – it's polite in China to initially decline. Repeat the offer once of twice; if you keep hearing the same answer, you can safely assume that it's for real.
Always bring a gift when you're invited to someone's home.
Some gifts are lucky, others unlucky. Give gifts in even numbers (pairs are lucky), but never give four of something, as the word for "four" sounds just like the word for "death." The same goes for the word "clock" – not a good gift.
Don't give something so costly or valuable that the giver would not be able to reciprocate.
Try not to give gifts in public places and try to wrap your gift if possible.
Colors matter: Wrap gifts in gold or red paper, never in black-and-white – but do not write in red ink.
It's considered impolite to open a wrapped gift in front of the giver. So don't be surprised if your gift remains unopened, and when you're on the receiving end, do not open yours unless the person who gave it tells you to.
You might think that a sincere note is a better expression of thanks than a gift. In fact, in China a gift is far preferred over even the nicest thank-you card.